Starting over

God is taking me on a journey. I am blown away that all those early whispers were truely His calling to me. I am delighted and in awe. I am falling in love all over again, and all the regrets....all the former failures....and all the stuff I tried to make succeed (even that which did) doesn't matter anymore. It finally doesn't matter.

Selah.


"... I count everything as loss compared to the possession of the priceless privilege (the overwhelming preciousness, the surpassing worth, and supreme advantage) of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord and of progressively becoming more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him [of perceiving and recognizing and understanding Him more fully and clearly]. For His sake I have lost everything and consider it all to be mere rubbish (refuse, dregs), in order that I may win (gain) Christ (the Anointed One),and that I may [actually] be found and known as in Him, not having any [self-achieved] righteousness that can be called my own, based on my obedience to the Law's demands (ritualistic uprightness and supposed right standing with God thus acquired), but possessing that [genuine righteousness] which comes through faith in Christ (the Anointed One), the [truly] right standing with God, which comes from God by [saving] faith.[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [[a]which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope]. Phil.3:8-10 (Amplified)




He is jealous for me
loves like a hurrican I am a tree
bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy

When all of a sudden...

I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by Glory
and I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me

And oh how He loves us oh
Oh how he loves us
how he loves us Oh

We are His portion
and He is our prize
drawn to redemption by the grace in his eyes
if grace is a notion than we're all sinking

so heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
and my heart turns violently inside of my chest

I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way
He loves us
oh how he loves us
He loves us
oh how He loves us....

(Song by John Mark McMillan)

Messenger of "Good News"

"Seeing more and more the wonderous supply of grace laid up in Jesus, the fulness of our precious saviour, my guilt and helplessness seemed to increase. Sins committed appeared but as trifles compared with the sin of unbelief which was their cause, which could not or would not take God at his word, but rather made Him a liar! Unbelief I felt was the damning sin of the world; yet I indulged in it. I prayed for faith, but it came not, What was I to do?......." (Hudson Taylor on the struggle for faith)

In my own longing to understand the depth and completeness of all Jesus has done,I found myself crying out "....but Lord I don't know that I yet fully BELIEVE in the finished work! I am still prone to trust my efforts. Why can't I comprehend?" In the quietness I hear...."Rest child, is it not your very unbelief that I have covered with my blood?"

Yes. The very core. The very root of all rotten fruit. Even that. Especially that!
You took MY unbelief and exchanged it for YOUR righteousness.

"If we believe not, He abideth faithful..." 2Timothy 2:13

"...But how to get faith strengthened? Not by striving after faith, but by resting on the Faithful One!...and when I saw, oh how joy flowed!.." (Hudson Taylor on the revelation of our oneness with Jesus)

So there's my sin....naked, exposed, craving self-effort and you whisper "Look away from your sin...look at MY righteousness. The righteousness that covers you even now. I am the only sure thing."

"I am crucified with Christ: neverthless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me." Galations 2:20

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"And when he comes, he will convince the world of it's sin, and of God's righteousness, and of the coming judgement. The world's sin is unbeleief in me. Righteousness is available because I go to the Father, and you will see me no more. Judgement will come because the prince of the world has already been judged." John 16:8